The Battle of Waterloo was the decisive military engagement that would bring an end to Napoleon Bonaparte’s rule as Emperor of the French.
Henry Paget, 2nd Earl of Uxbridge, led the British heavy cavalry, one of the units of the Anglo-allied army commanded by Arthur Wellesley, 1st Duke of Wellington.
As modern accounts go, after the initial heavy cavalry charge, Lord Uxbridge continued to lead a series of light cavalry formations, having eight or nine horses shot out from under him.
Toward the end of the day, Uxbridge was riding alongside the Duke of Wellington, surveying the aftermath. One of the last random cannon shots of the battle fired a load of rusty grapeshot that shattered Uxbridge’s right leg.
According to anecdote, Uxbridge turned to Wellington and exclaimed, “By God, sir, I’ve lost my leg!”
“By God, sir, so you have!” replied Wellington.
While this verbal exchange between Paget and Wellesley is likely apocryphal, the events are certainly true. It’s also true that what remained of Paget’s leg would require amputation.
Scottish surgeon John Hume amputated Paget’s leg mid-thigh, without antiseptic or anesthetic.
Despite what must have been an intensely painful operation, Paget by all accounts remained steadfast, calm, and even lighthearted during the procedure. He joked about his long run as an excellent dancer and ladies man, and how it was finally time to give the younger guys a fair shot.
Various sources say that, during the surgery, he made comments about the knives being dull. After the surgery, Paget reputedly proclaimed, “Who would not lose a leg for such a victory?”
Paget received one of the first modern prosthetic legs, with a hinged knee and ankle. His amputated leg was interred in the village of Waterloo, and became something of a tourist attraction.
Paget’s ability to face tremendous adversity with exemplary courage and composure epitomizes the classically British attribute of “keeping a stiff upper lip.”
I say that the term “keep a stiff upper lip” is classically British, since it has become so associated with a sort of national character of plucky stoicism exhibited by the Brits. But truth be told, the expression appears to have originated in the U.S.
No matter, though, because stiff upper lippery is so regularly associated with the British disposition that it was the basis for the World War II “Keep Calm and Carry On” motivational poster.
The posters were never widely displayed during the war, but the design was rediscovered and revitalized in the twenty-first century. Various imitations, adaptations, and parodies have made the design a widely recognized meme.
Stoic tradition was prevalent in Victorian England, and the works of Seneca and Marcus Aurelius were popular textbooks in the public schools of the time.
In Meditations, Marcus Aurelius writes, “If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”
In other words, we have the power to detach ourselves from the emotional judgments we might make in response to our circumstances or experiences.
This type of mental balance and composure is known as equanimity.
Key facets of equanimity
Equanimity is most often described as mental calmness, composure, and stability. A state of balance or equilibrium.
Equanimity enables us to accept what is and where we are.
Equanimity frees us from maladaptive attachment to outcome, and allows us to react to the world without unwarranted emotion.
Equanimity gives us clarity by freeing us from much of the world’s noise and distraction.
As a core serendipity strategy, equanimity is the underlying mental state that can unleash our ability to recognize and evaluate opportunity.
A content analysis of journal articles and online posts reveals a number of recurring words and phrases used to describe the quality of equanimity:
- balance, balanced, centered
- calm, calmness, composure
- neutral, impartial, dispassionate
- stable, steady, unshakable
- even, even-minded, even-tempered
- acceptance, accepting
- free, independent, liberated
- clear, clarity
- control, self-control
- detachment, freedom from attachment
- open, openness
- peace, peaceful
Correspondingly, here are several words and phrases that people used to describe what equanimity is not:
- indifference
- complacency
- cold, frigid, heartless
- apathy
- aloofness
- rigidity
- passivity
- resignation
So, the general consensus is that equanimity is a state of balance, calmness, and impartiality that keeps us on an even keel and gives us the clarity and peace we need to be more open to experience and accepting of our circumstances.
At the same time, equanimity need not make us indifferent, complacent, or cold-hearted.
Equanimity can be thought of as an impartial state of mind, “which cannot be swayed by biases or preferences.” Or, as simply a state of neutrality which “leans neither toward gladness nor dejection.”[1]
But equanimity is more than just a passive state of mind. It allows us to resolve inner conflicts and channel our anger and frustration into positive action.[2]
Further, equanimity engages – and likely enhances – our capacity to frame and reframe meaning under stress while maintaining our composure. This aspect of equanimity, then, involves a complex process of “pause, reflection, and self-transcendence.”[3]
According to the Theravada monk Nyanaponika Thera, equanimity is far from indifference or dullness. In truth, it requires a keen presence of mind. Equanimity is “the calm and firm hand led by wisdom” that directs vigilant self-control for the sake of our driving purpose and higher goals.[4]
Equanimity, says Thera, is an unshakable balance of mind rooted in insight. Rather than causing an “emptiness” of emotion, equanimity leads to a “fullness” of understanding.[5]
Equanimity allows us to accept negative feelings while maintaining a peaceful (rather than greedy) attitude toward positive feelings. Equanimity also heightens our awareness of nascent emotional impulses, which can significantly enhance our ability to regulate our behavior.[6]
Equanimity frees us from both excessive attachment and excessive aversion, making it much easier to control our emotions and impulses and stay on track toward what’s really important to us.
One definition from the literature proposes that equanimity is both:[7]
- A mental attitude of openness, even-mindedness, and acceptance that can be intentionally cultivated through practice; and
- An enduring state or trait that is the end result of such training.
Over time and with practice, equanimity can become an effortless process that we no longer need to purposefully invoke.[8]
So, we can improve equanimity with practice, perhaps to the point that it becomes intuitive. Maybe it eventually becomes a background cognitive process that positively influences all of our thought and behavior.
Methods we can use to develop equanimity
Cultivating equanimity involves finding the right balance between cognition, emotion, energy, and experience. There are several techniques we can use to help us increase our self-awareness of specific aspects of our personality that may need refinement if we want to be more equanimous.
Meditate
There is no shortage of research extolling the virtues of meditation. It has been correlated with reduced stress, anxiety, and blood pressure, and improved mood, memory, attention, sleep, emotional health, focus, and self-awareness.
You can do it almost anywhere, with no special training or equipment required, and for any length of time you choose.
There are a variety of meditational forms and techniques. If we are meditating specifically to improve attentional focus, for example, we may use a slightly different technique than if we are meditating to broaden our awareness.
But even if you’ve never meditated before, you can start immediately and adjust your meditative goals and techniques as you learn more and get into the habit of doing it. At the most basic level, all it involves is sitting someplace relatively quiet, closing your eyes, relaxing, and focusing on your breathing.
I meditate for 10-15 minutes, three or four times a week. This might be the only thing I have in common with Bill Gates.
As Gates writes, “It’s about taking a few minutes out of my day, learning how to pay attention to the thoughts in my head, and gaining a little bit of distance from them.”
Meditation is one of the simplest things we can do to become more equanimous.
It’s also one of the easiest positive lifestyle habits to acquire and stick with. I mean, really, you’re mostly just sitting there.
Be more mindful
In my 7 Serendipity Strategies post, I cite a definition from psychological literature that describes mindfulness as “a receptive attention to and awareness of present events and experience.”[9]
Mindfulness and equanimity have a symbiotic relationship. Whereas mindfulness involves awareness of and attention to our thoughts, emotions, environment, and experiences, equanimity involves objectively understanding, balancing, processing, and calmly reacting (or choosing not to react) to all of these stimuli.
Mindfulness can give us the clarity of awareness we need to be more equanimous, and equanimity enables to process and attend to input more calmly and rationally.
Mindfulness and meditation are often linked, too, as meditation is an excellent way to help improve sensory awareness and attentional focus.
In addition to meditation, activities such as tai chi, qigong, and yoga can help improve mindfulness. In fact, these practices usually involve meditation in some capacity.
We can also integrate mindfulness into our daily routine by slowing down and giving more deliberate and thoughtful attention to tasks, focusing on one task at a time instead of multitasking, and setting some clear boundaries that eliminate distractions.
Improving our observational and listening skills will make us more mindful, too.
Embrace impermanence
The idea of impermanence was fundamental to the philosophy of Heraclitus. He is credited with the phrase panta rhei (“everything flows”).
But probably his most well-known adage is, “No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man.”
Understanding that everything is essentially transient, and that nothing stays the same forever, can help us free ourselves from attachment. Without understanding and accepting impermanence, we will not manage change or loss well.
Generally, negative circumstances aren’t permanent, and neither are positive ones. Rational acceptance of the impermanent nature of almost everything helps us accept negative thoughts and emotions, and helps to avoid desperately grasping for positive thoughts and emotions.
We want to remain flexible in the face of change and be prepared to suspend our judgment and shift our goals, instead of dwelling on whatever loss change may have brought to us.
Accepting impermanence allows us to take a more reasoned, dispassionate view of things when change produces feelings of loss to which we might otherwise overreact.
Understand control
We can focus our effort and energy more effectively when we understand what we can and can’t control. This understanding eliminates a lot of unnecessary fear, anxiety, and worry, and allows us to approach decisions with composure and clarity.
I discuss understanding control at some length in my free 20-page guide, but basically there are only three levels of control:
- Complete control
- Some control
- No control
When evaluating a situation or choosing a course of action, the first thing we should do is determine our level of control. This simple step allows us to prioritize our potential actions and eliminates a lot of needless stress and wasted energy.
It’s much easier to approach things calmly and rationally when we have a clear sense of what we can and can’t control.
Practice impartiality
In all circumstances, calmly consider the facts that are available to you. Don’t try to draw conclusions or pass judgment. Just sort out the known and the unknown.
Personal and cognitive biases can influence our judgment, often without us even realizing it. We can’t necessarily eliminate our biases, but we can recognize them and mitigate their impact on our thinking.
Try not to make assumptions based on bias. If you sense this could be happening, start questioning yourself to get to the real root of the information you are processing. What is your objective? What is your motivation?
Take ownership of your thoughts and feelings. Understand how your emotions affect your perception. Positive emotions often cause us to perceive others more favorably, and negative emotions cause us to consider them less favorably.
Try to reinterpret or reframe things so that the impact of emotion is minimized. If you feel negative emotions are affecting your judgment, try to get to the root cause. Do you have some irrational fear that is affecting your judgment? Some past negative experience?
Try to self-distance by considering your own thoughts and emotions from the perspective of someone else.
Equanimity is rooted in the ability to minimize the impact of our feelings on our thoughts. Striking a balance between emotion and cognition is imperative, but to do this we have to acknowledge and accept – not deny and suppress – our feelings.
It’s all on you, though
Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Nobody can bring you peace but yourself.”
For most people, achieving equanimity will take some work. It isn’t easy for most of us to free ourselves from our attachment to outcome, to recognize how our feelings are affecting our thinking, or to accept what is and who we are without judgment.
However, by expanding our self-awareness – and by prioritizing and practicing equanimity – we can improve our ability to handle whatever comes our way with composure.
